I am not well

This morning was the battle between healthy and lard. Let me explain.

I woke up at an un-godly amount of early to go to the Farmer's Market with my mom. And by un-godly amount of early I mean the kind of early wherein you're so tired that you put your underwear on inside out but don't realize it until five minutes ago. Anyway, I had been looking forward to going to the market all week. In fact, I changed some plans I had so that I could go with her this morning. After showering and inducing joyfulness with Girlyman, coffee and nicotine, I was ready to go. Only, my mom was not downstairs? I knock on her door, "Mom?" "What?" she replies. "Are we going to the market?" I ask. "What time is it?" she responds. I tell her and then she says "No, I'm in bed." I think my jaw must have dropped in a noisy fashion because she said, "Get away from my door."

Irritated, angry and hungry, I left the house to go the market on my own with a cup of coffee to keep me company. I bought some peaches and then I bought some McDonald's biscuits. When I got back I sat on the porch and ate a biscuit while on the phone with a friend. I went inside and sat down to eat the second biscuit due to mega amounts of hungry inside my tummy. But, something strange happened. Suddenly, I couldn't finish the biscuit and instead had a craving for one of the peaches. I don't know if you guys know how monumental this is.

I. have. never. not. finished. a. biscuit.

Just ask anyone who lives within a twenty mile radius of Sewanee, TN. They all know that I LOVE BISCUITS. I probably love biscuits more than life, especially if they have cheese and egg and bacon on them. So, if anyone needs me, I'll be at a doctor getting myself checked out for psychological issues and/or physical ailments.

Synopsis:
1. Mom's suck.
2. Farmers get up too early.
3. I am not well.