Hi, my name is Bertha and I have the suckiest job ever.

Oh my God in Heaven, this day is never going to end, ever.

Nine hours on a cash register selling food to arrogant people who don't have senses of humor is like stabbing yourself in the eye with a rusty butter knife.

Highlights of the Day:
1. I went on break right when the Mother Down Pour of all Horrific Down Pours, ya know, down poured. But it's okay, because there were rain boots in my trunk and I definitely wore them all around the grocery store during my forty-five minute break. I looked like half garden lady/half grocery store clerk. It was quite The Spectacle.
2. Right when the giggles hit due to lack of sleep I got the most pretentious customer, ever. He was buying a pepper and I didn't know what kind of pepper it was, so I asked...duh? Hungarian Wax...excellent. "Sorry, sir, I just can't remember all of the twenty-something kinds of peppers we have". "It's okay," he replied. Then I was searching for the produce number on a tomato he was purchasing because like the peppers, there are about a gazillion different types of tomatoes at the store. He looked at me mid-search and says, "It's a tomato." Then he laughed at me. So, I looked right at him and in front of my boss and all the customers in my line and I mock laughed at him. Well, he didn't like that too much, but the lady behind him in line thought it was about the most hysterical thing she'd ever seen. I totally lost it and laughed with her. I apologized to him through fits of the giggles and he left. The lady behind him who was at that point my favorite person in the whole wide grocery world, proceeded to joke with me. My boss had some words about the situation after my line cleared. Did I care? No.

That's about it. I'm taking a nap dammit.