I stood alone one evening
in the middle of a crowd
familiar to me
in a legible way
but not in any language I’ve ever written
to them and with them
they say I should belong
but I find that unlikely
as I look into your eyes and you paint
a picture of longing
love and lingering sentiment
that exists only on paper
along with that list
you reference at Lunch
I am a resume,
An outline,
A table of contents.
To a life you think you want,
But I know better.
It is everything I want
And Long to hear
while it provokes
everything I don’t want
and of which I Long to be rid.
I only desired your happiness
But I am finding that this wish
Is at the expense of my own
I want more moments
Or do I want my moments returned to me
I cannot confirm either
But they are both truths
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2 comments:
so as not to pry further than i am engaging.. would one be safe to assume the lie you speak of is that "i only desired your happiness" or that you were never actually familiar with the crowd you stood alone in. i could elaborate, but would likely embarrass myself by incorrectly making presumptions to know your mind.
the lie is the list. the resume presented to me, at my own expense, which is what makes it the lie.
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